Who needs a life cycle?

My first grand-nephew was born Thursday night! How wonderful and how strange that my young nephew Philip now has a son. It of course reminds me of the Circle of Life, and I have to admit, I hate the idea. Puppies and babies are fine, but as I find myself at the other end (and end is exactly what I mean) of that circle, it doesn't make me happy in any way.

Losing my parents in 2001 and 2006 was, of course, hard. What seems to be hard for me now is knowing that I am the oldest in my immediate family-- next in line, so to speak. No wonder I'm afraid to go to a doctor. Michael went for a check-up recently and had a glimpse of his mortality. I am more than aware of it. Knowing I need to make arrangements for my demise-- will, plans for the dogs, and the unspeakable, death wishes.I'm sorry. I can't speak of the beauty of the life cycle.

It scares me shitless!